a person wrapped in red tape that says fearI remember when I first started dating again after my 24 year marriage ended.

I was in my mid 40’s and it was feeling really SCARY!

I had to dig deep and find the courage to breakthrough some of the fears and self doubt I was feeling so I could find the right man for me.

Today I want to share the 3 Steps I used to overcome my own fears.

These are steps you can start using right now in your own life.

1. Take a No-Excuses Approach

Great guys are everywhere.

Yet when you’re not sure what to do or how to handle the dating issues that come up, its easy to use excuses for why your love life isn’t going the way you’d like it to.

Everyday I hear excuses like these . . . “There’s no good men left out there to date,”  “I’m too busy to date,”  “No time to date,” “All men are jerks” and the list goes on.

To get the right guy into your life, you’ve got to be willing to let go of the excuses and get yourself online or safely out in the real world meeting men.

This is the ONLY way you can find a man who is a good fit for you.

Ask yourself . . . How badly do you want a companion in your life?

You can either have excuses or you can have results.

Which one do you choose?

2. Feel the Fear—But Do It Anyway

Your ego creates fear to keep you safe.

Everyone feels fear and why shouldn’t they?

You’re putting yourself out there and that makes you vulnerable.

Who hasn’t felt a fear of rejection, a fear of not being good enough, a fear of being humiliated, a fear of making mistakes, a fear men might not like you, or a fear of the unknown, just to name a few.

Most single women I know experience fear.

What separates the women who get the guys from those who allow their fears to hold them back is a willingness to date in spite of the fears they may be feeling.

The best way for you to get over your dating fears is to walk directly into them.

Let yourself feel them.

Ask the fear what it’s trying to tell you.

Then journal or meditate on the answers you hear.

It takes courage to do this – courage I see my clients show everyday when they put themselves in the vulnerable position of meeting new men even though they are shaking in their boots as they do it.

Actually, walking into fear is never as bad as you think it’s going to be.

And if you allow yourself to really feel the fears versus resisting them . . . what you might end up with is a great guy in your life.

Imagine how that would feel!

 3. Be Willing to Get Out of Your Dating Comfort Zone

Most of us avoid discomfort like it’s the plague yet it’s the best way to grow and get what you really want in life.

Here’s one of my favorite mantras that can help you get through this . . .

I am ready to date.  I am willing to find and meet new men even when I feel uncomfortable.  I know uncomfortable equals growth and growth equals achieving my dreams of finding the man I want to share my life with. 

Now its time to work through your fears and break out of your comfort zone so you can have the man and the relationship you’ve been wanting in your life.

I can’t wait to hear how these 3 tips work for you.

Believing in you!

Hugs~

Lisa

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