Here’s what NOT to do if you want a second date
You’re an over 50’s woman who meets a great over 50’s man at an Online Dating Site.
Your conversation on the phone is amazing.
He’s talking about the future and you’re getting excited.
When you meet, you really like him and you think he likes you.
Yet he doesn’t ask you out again and you leave the date feeling devastated.
Has this ever happened to you?
In today’s blog, I want to share these 2 mistakes with you and show you what you can do instead to turn this part of your dating life around.
#1 over 50’s Dating Mistake . . . You Don’t Match the Picture In His Head
Do you carry a specific picture in your mind of the man you’d like to spend the rest of your life with?
Most of us do, so it shouldn’t be surprising when I tell you men do as well.
In fact, when a man contacts you, it’s because he believes that you and the picture in his head just might be a match.
So he emails you and if he likes your emails, he suggests talking on the phone.
The two of you connect.
And something interesting happens.
He starts doing what I call future talking.
For example . . . you’re talking on the phone and he asks if you like sushi because he likes sushi.
If you say yes, he might say something like . . . “Let’s try out the latest Japanese restaurant in your area.”
(Don’t take questions like these seriously. He’s just seeing how you might and notice I said might fit into his life.)
His picture is working overtime, thinking you might be the one and you get excited thinking maybe he’s right for you too!
Then the two of you meet.
It goes nowhere and a second date doesn’t happen.
When this occurs, don’t take it personally.
It’s not about you.
It’s just the picture in his head of who he wants and you don’t match.
You probably do this to men too when you say no to them.
They don’t match who you want.
You want to limit the number of emails you exchange to 5-10 max and the time you spend on the phone to 1 or 2 calls max prior to meeting a new man.
You don’t want to get yourself emotionally invested in an imaginary relationship with a man you have yet to meet.
#2 over 50’s Dating Mistake . . . You Have Sex With A Man Too Quickly!
You meet a man, the chemistry is hot and as the date is ending, the two of you start kissing and kissing and kissing some more.
Hands start roving all over the place and you find yourself in the back seat of the car having sex with a man you’ve only known a couple of hours.
You’re both on fire.
At this moment, it feels good and it feels right.
When it’s over, he kisses you and says, “I’ll call you” but he doesn’t.
Why? The sex was too easy for him to get.
Men categorize the women they date into two groups.
The first is the women they play with, as in first date sex or friends with benefits situations.
It’s easy sex, it’s fun for him but that’s all it is.
Then there is the second category, the woman he considers as potential relationship material.
This is when he thinks the two of you might be a match.
So if you want to make it to category number two, promise yourself, even when your hormones are raging, that you’ll slow it down.
Hold off having sex and this means anything beyond kissing until you think a real relationship is a possibility.
There are all kinds of reasons men don’t call back… Some are as silly as a mannerism you display that reminds him of his ex.
Save yourself a lot of date analysis and evaluation by not taking the first date personally and by not being invested in how it’s going to turn out.
If it’s meant to be, it will be. And if it’s not, chalk it up to an opportunity to spend some time with a new and interesting person that day.
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